Passion

What does living with PASSION really mean?? To me, living with passion means expressing all of the positive energy in everything you do. Exploding into something without letting anything stopping you. It means living every moment as important. And most importantly, it means finding joy in your everyday life.
Not too long ago I started pursuing living with passion. I tried to be joyful in everything I did, and I always had energy. When people asked me how I managed, I told them that I put my heart into everything I did. "Everything is worth doing with all the love in your heart," I told them, and I meant it. Even my worst days couldn't drag me down because I put passion into with positive attitude.
Then I hit a rough spot in my life; living passionately faded away as I struggled just to live happily. For a while the passion was gone from me. In its place was boredom and sadness. I finally sought help & really looked into God‘s promise for me and began to look with eyes full of life and vibrancy. I also had the help of my two little boys that live with love every day & not a care in the world & they are what give me the push to live with passion.
So what's my formula to living passionately now….hmmm?
No excuses. If I want to, or need to, do something, all I need to do is go out and do it this was a lesson ingrained in me with tears and a lot of tough times . There are no excuses for not doing something. I must be constantly motivated to live. Although I first grumbled about this policy, it has since allowed me to be enthusiastic about any task or not scared out of taking on new things.
Smiling. Lifting the corners of my lips was not easy at first; now it has become a regular habit. There is a sense of euphoria, a release of chemicals in the brain, when you smile. Smiling, even when things seem tough, brings a sense of calm back to the situation. From that calm, you can reach inside your heart and share your passion again.
Everything to its fullest. This is a short way of the philosophy I had a few years ago, in which I told people to do everything with all the love in your heart. All of us possess passion and love in our hearts. It isn't romantic love; it is an overwhelming love for the EVERYTHING, for life, for existing. By putting that loving energy into everything I do, I find that everything can be done with passion and others can thrive off that passion and find the same joy. I feel like God feels me everyday & has giving me this passion once again.
Finding my spiritual supporter, comforter and Father has given me a reason to live passionately & do things for people to my fullest. Go out confident that life has nothing but love to offer is my greatest suggestion.

There is inside you
All of the potential
To be whatever you want to be;
All of the energy
To do whatever you want to do.
Imagine yourself as you would like to be,
Doing what you want to do,
And each day, take one step
Towards your dream.
And though at times it may seem too
difficult to continue,
Hold on to your dream.
One morning you will awake to find
That you are the person you dreamed of,
Doing what you wanted to do,
Simply because you had the courage
To believe in your potential
And to hold on to your dream.

“Here I go again on my own”

So you know t that AT&T wireless commercial where the dad is always traveling and he takes along his daughter's stuffed monkey.  You know, the one where he takes pictures of the monkey while traveling and sends them to his wife and daughter? I have realized that the cute AT&T commercial is actually my reality…. Ha ha!

Steven is an engineer for a new up and coming international oil company that requires him to travel out of the state A LOT and FOR A LONG TIME. So I typically get one of two reactions to our situation –" I could not do that- how are you surviving- man that would make me go crazy"or
You're so lucky! I wish my hubby traveled! Can he work for your husband?"

Really our situation works for us (or maybe we are just making it work because we have to??).  Our time apart makes our time together even more exciting and I def value him so much more.  I like having alone time & set schedules & routines too.  I like doing things my own way that consist of order I guess and he doesn't so it works out ok in that way.  I have learned to be an independent person and more importantly independent mom. I can say that I am working towards the supermom label.  I can fix things around the house, take care of the yard, minor electrical problems and so on.  If there is a plumbing leak I can usually find a solution to it after researching. If there is a problem, I def don't look at it as an bad thing maybe just a challenge. I can drive his big manly truck with no problem now, and still dress up nicely in ones days work. I can multi-task and take care of myself, my husband, my toddler boys and all the messes & outbreaks they bring along( wow and there is A LOT). I take care of our financial situations like paying all the bills and keeping things updated.  And while I can get overwhelmed at times, I think I really thrive on it & setting those short term goals everyday makes me feel a sense of confidence at the end of the day.

As we hit this phase in our life, I just wondered " How will my husband's long traveling schedule fit into FAMILY LIFE?  How will I manage doing all of the above when there is 1.5 & 3.5 yr old attached to my hip and have no family to help?  And more importantly, how will I stop myself from resenting him?  He'll get to leave town, sleep in a quiet hotel in resort areas, eat on his company's money, drink fine wines & have margaritas? He gets to worry about taking care of no one but himself without hearing anyone. While I am having to learn new ways to cope with out a male in their life & mine. Having to hear toddlers all day long for weeks. Having no "adult time" or even "girl time" without my kids.

After really thinking & dealing with our situation by myself, I have learned to appreciate him & be thankful for what he provides for us. Learned how to stay in touch with myself as individual & to appreciate myself not just as a mom but as a whole.. I have learned to do things that I never thought I would have to do. I have learned to that communication can be a sensative thing & to value & watch what you say and never hold your feelings back. Time away has made me much more creative & to think out of the box. I have learned to never give up & to always try. I have learned that my role as a mom is very much needed. I have learned that I am such a strong person even when I had no idea of my inner strength.

As for Steven, I just hope he can redirect his thoughts when he comes home. This time he has been in Mexico really has changed him in such a good way, so I hope he comes with the same attitude and puts that towards his family. I hope he has had some realizations as well. He has surprised me with his thoughtfulness because being gone so long I think has made him care for us that much more. So maybe time away does help our relationship & family time. I mean it def is so hard after 4 weeks of being away from us because I don't get the opportunity to meet anyone. Its hard to haul 2 toddlers around & then have an adult conversation while my 1.5 yr old is running as far as he can from me and laughing looking back. Maybe something will work out where I can meet with other moms here and that will make my time better without him.. I am a young mom but I love & put all my attention into them, so I hope I can connect with other moms that are similar. All in all, a traveling husband has it downsides but ultimately I think it will bring us together & the boys will live a great life because of the hard work on Steven's part & the time & effort I give. So how can I complain about my situation?!! Instead, I should be grateful.

 

 

Cash for Clunckers

Its Been A While...

Well it has been a while since I last blogged. The reason why is not because I have not had things exciting or dramatic go on maybe because I have been so tired to even think of words to type by the end of the day. With Steven being gone to Mexico, I am usually taking care and consumed by the boys all day. Even though they both are great and have great sleeping schedules, I usually finish up my "must do" list of things for that day or do a lot of research while I catch up on shows. Needless to say Steven just got back into town so here I am blogging.

Steven is gone a lot for work and I am here to handle our family responsibilities and take care of the boys more importantly. I really have been thinking a lot about just my past in general of living different places and having ups and DOWNS. I just feel like God maybe let us go through things in our life to prepare us for this place in our life. I don't think I would be able to handle Steven being gone from us ALL the time if I was not already use to a life similar to that. At those times I had no idea what I was doing and really questioning "how am I going to do this?" or maybe even "why?" I can see now & understand why God let those hard times come. God really helped me to be a stronger person from it all & learn things I would have never learned if I didn't have to struggle. I would have never have opened my eyes or humbled myself enough I do not think. I truly believe now that God can do so much work in you in your low times and maybe HE is just preparing you for something great too. God can really use your life even if you had no idea as an example. Maybe there are other women out there that could connect to my exact same situation. I can now testify that God is great and has used my hard & unthinkable situations for something beyond what I thought. There is no way I can explain why or why not but ultimately If i know God is in control then I can handle anything. There are tough times since Steven travels so much but my true test is how I handle it. I feel like where we are right now ( and STEVEN LOVES HIS JOB) is just the beginning and God has so much in store. God has placed on my heart that HE has begun a great work in me and I feel like there will be a special way He will use me. I have no idea what that may be but hopefully I can be patient and just WAIT and TRUST.

I just hope I do not get blinded by things and let it alter my potential. Thankfully I trust in someone that is so forgiving!!!!


Finally, what I was trying to get to from the beginning is WE ARE MOVING TO THE WOODLANDS http://www.thewoodlands.com/ Its northern Houston about 20 mins from the Galleria area where we live now. I am so in love with the Galleria but maybe not so much too raise a family without Steven here. The Woodlands seems so perfect. Its known as "the bubble" which means its one of a kind & security. Feeling safe is a top priority because I feel like I can not even live when I am always worried because I am the nurturer and PROTECTOR.We are really excited and I love the house. It was a lot to go through and figure out what & where was the best but I am so happy because its beautiful but its going to feel like home. I am just so excited Caden and Camden will have a backyard to play in finally. I better invest in some sunscreen right now because most of our days will be spent out there or at a park- http://www.thewoodlands.com/parks-pathways-lakes.htm

WE move into our house on Thursday. I packed up everything & we are ready to go besides cleaning Caden's beautiful sticker collection & art work on the walls and doors( yeah thats what happens when daddy babysits)

Fasting & Prayer

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land."





Soo today is Ash Wednesday, the start of Lent, the 40-day period of sacrifice and reflection observed by many Christians (especially, but not exclusively, Catholics) as a way to prepare for the Easter celebration of Jesus' death and resurrection. Traditionally in the Catholic Church, Lent was a time of fasting -- defined as abstaining from meat and limiting oneself to one full meal a day, usually around noon. The Lenten fast is intended to recall Jesus' 40 days of fasting in the desert before he began his public ministry. The tradition of fasting led, in modern times, is "giving something up" for Lent -- if not food, then at least ice cream; if not meat, then at least pepperoni pizza. And the season is not just about sacrifice -- it's also a time of prayer and reflection, of learning. So in addition to "giving something up," people often commit to doing something positive -- to praying every day, or attending Mass/church daily, or treating everyone with kindness and patience. You know I have never really known too much about lent since I grew up southern baptist. I have taken on a lot of reading and research & come to realize that lent is a special time to really reflect upon your sinful ways and to rejoice in Gods time in the desert before his ministry. I have been thinking about what I could give up and there are tons of things that consume me.. So basically I'm trying to not let the things that I " have to have" like the internet, television, and my iphone "take me over" this period of time. I want to take this serious & try to gain my love again for God. I feel like if I can discipline myself as a christian than God will hear my cries and my prayers. Im not only doing this for my own self gain but for my kids as well. I always want God to hear me when I call to him about my children. I have also decided to fast. I have been researching this for years and finally decided to do it. There are many times in the Bible Jesus did it and so did others. I want to take away & God to fill me in this time. I think this could possibly rejuvenate me in many ways. It seems weird I guess but I think God will fufill me and what can be better than that?? So hopefully I can not let a certain thing consume me-----This is going to be really hard for me but i think it something that will be good for me.

Here are some reasons why I decided to fast:

* Fasting was an expected discipline in both the Old and New Testament eras. For example, Moses fasted at least two recorded forty-day periods. Jesus fasted 40 days and reminded His followers to fast, "when you fast," not if you fast.
* Fasting and prayer can restore the loss of the "first love" for your Lord and result in a more intimate relationship with Christ.
* Fasting is a biblical way to truly humble yourself in the sight of God (Psalm 35:13; Ezra 8:21). King David said, "I humble myself through fasting."
* Fasting enables the Holy Spirit to reveal your true spiritual condition, resulting in brokenness, repentance, and a transformed life.
* The Holy Spirit will quicken the Word of God in your heart and His truth will become more meaningful to you!
* Fasting can transform your prayer life into a richer and more personal experience.
* Fasting can result in a dynamic personal revival in your own life-and make you a channel of revival to others.
* Fasting and prayer are the only disciplines that fulfill the requirements of II Chronicles 7:14:


Wish me luck!!!!!!! :)

Houston

Description of Houston from what I have seen so far:

Houston has a diverse mix of cultures. In fact, it is considered one of the most culturally diverse cities in America. It is a fast paced city, but a whole lot more laid back than New York City. For the most part, people in Houston are kind, helpful, open, and courtesy - these qualities vanish however when we are on the road in traffic. Rudeness and road rage abound. The weather is wonderful , but I heard hit June - August and it's hot and HUMID, almost unbearably so I was told. You won't have a problem with dry skin here I'm guessing. You must have a car, public transportation, because the city is so spread out, over 600 square miles, is poor at best. We have many, many things to do in Houston, you name it and we have it: over 40 museums, the arts, the symphony, theater, sporting events, over 10,000 retaurants with more than 290 different types of cuisines. The latest in medical technology is found in Houston which is considered the largestm and most prestigious medical center in the world. If you are in that particular line of work, opportunities abound. In general Houston has not suffered from the current financial crisis as other states. The home values have held. Cost of living is one of the lowest in the nation. Houston is, generally speaking, a more conservative bunch. This is the Bible belt, you know, and that's a very good thing. If you don't know who you are, then you don't know where you are going. it seems very business oriented but family oriented bunch as well. The flavor of the city is cosmopolitan with overtones of country and the promient Mexican culture. So yeah thats what I think of Houston so far of course I have not been here long and could change my views who knows!!!

I do have to say, it is kindof different to be a stay at home mom here because we are living right in the middle of the business district where it never stops!!! It is the oil capital of the world!!! I really enjoy the big city, but sometimes feel like I need to be working along with everyone else. I just want to raise the boys first though because I feel like its my responsibility. I dont want to regret working and not having time with my boys when they were young. My circumstances are different too considering Steven is out of town most the time anyway- I guess Im all they've got here in H- town!! I just hope it all pays off & they boys will be well behaved as they get older too..haha lets just hope!

Also, I do really love that we are in walking distance to everything you would ever want. I have to have TONS of self control thats for sure :) Anyway, Im happy to be here, and hopefully I will fall in love with it since its our new home!