Saturday, November 14, 2009

Called to be Mothers


From: Jerry Maguire (Tom Cruise)

"I’m out here for you! You don’t
know what it’s like to be me out
here for you. It is an up-at-dawn
pride-swallowing siege that I will
never fully tell you about!"




He may have been talking there about the pitfalls of being a sports agent, but I tell you, it hits home – for me, maybe not you – for being a mother ( and wife too in some ways)!
There are days like this where I question what I do and where my Me-hood in Parenthood is under all the pressures,chores,and responsibilities. I think alot of times this runs through people's mind 'You mean that's all you do? That's all?(which is quite funny to me for many reasons)
As a mother, Your life is given to fight for the ones you love and to take ESPECIALLY to take care of people, small ones to begin with, whose wants never seem to ever, ever end. Sometimes when your days seem to be solely taken up with wiping things, dishes and sinks, floors, lysoling (-which is my favorite thing to do..lol) little runny noses and big, slow tears, and in ALL THIS you wonder about what fulfillment is supposed to mean for you. You wonder about being, besides the perfect wife and mother the hostess with the mostest, creative, intellectually productive, beautiful, and slowly your dreams seem to evaporate. You've been listening to what they're telling us nowadays about how important it is to find yourself, express yourself and assert yourself which is great to do but have to remember what is desired of us. Maybe you're thinking that you're nothing more than somebody's wife and somebody else's mother, and what kind of a life is that and you start doubting not only yourself but everyting in your life? Well, It makes me think of this tribe I read about in the southern Sudan called Nuers where a woman's name is changed not when she becomes a wife, but when she becomes a mother. She is manpuka, mother of puka. Among the Nuers, being someone's mother is what makes a woman's life meaningful. THEN you think about
2,000 years ago there was another young woman of the Jewish tribe of Judah who understood that truth. The world has never forgotten her,MARY the MOTHER of Jesus, because she was willing to be known as simply someone's mother.

Motherhood is a calling. It's a womanly calling. And let's not be cowed by those who extinguish the light and joy of sexuality by trying to persuade us to forget words like manly and womanly. At the beginning of time when God made the first man and the first woman in His image, He put both under the divine command to be fruitful.
The woman's obedience to that command meant self-giving. First, she gave herself to her husband. He initiated. She responded. Then she gave herself for the life of her child. A woman knows in the deepest regions of her being that it's this very self-giving for which she was made, single or married. Her level of maturity is measured by how much she gives to others. If she's married, she gives herself to her husband and she receives. If she's a mother, she loses her life in her child and mysteriously she finds it. A woman knows that no one can really say where the giving ends and the receiving starts.

It's no wonder we're confused when urged to look for some better or higher vocation in which to prove our personhood. No wonder we're distressed to be subjected to male standards or told that the notion of femininity and masculinity are obsolete. Old-fashioned notions they are indeed, but they weren't ours to begin wit!!!. They were God's. He planned the whole system, and it's God Himself who calls. He calls some to be single, some married people to be childless, but He calls most women to be M O T H E R S. There are, the Bible tells us, differences of gifts and they're all given according to God's grace. If our calling is to be mothers, let's be mothers with all our hearts-gladly, simply, and humbly, like that little peasant girl Mary, who spoke for all women for all time when she said,

'Behold, the handmaid of the Lord. Be it unto me according to Thy word.'"

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Discipline Questionnaire- Dr. Phil


Part One

1. My children can predict the consequences of their actions with a high degree of accuracy.

2. My children know they have to perform certain things they don't want to do in order to get access to things they do want to do.

3. My partner and I present a united front regarding rules and discipline to our children.

4. I adjust my communications to my child to his/her level of understanding, taking his/her age into account.

5. I am friendly and loving with my children yet I have established myself clearly as a respected authority figure in their lives.

Part Two

1. I choose rewards and punishments based on what works.

2. I reward my child for good behavior.

3. I parent without guilt.

4. I am sensitive to not over-scheduling my child.

5. I render discipline without anger.


Scoring: If you answered "false" to any questions in part one or part two, there are things you can do to more effectively discipline your child.

Advice
# Avoid some common parenting mistakes.
# You may be using forms of discipline that are ineffective at your child's age.


From The Show

* Are You Disciplining Your Child the Wrong Way?

Related Links

* Biggest Mistakes Parents Make
* Questions to Ask Before Spanking
* What to Do When You Disagree on Discipline
* Listening to Your Child's Bad Behavior
* Five Steps to Disciplining Your Child
* The Pros and Cons of Spanking
* Stop Spoiling Your Kids



http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/255

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Just A Mom

Just A Mom

A woman, renewing her driver's license at the County Clerk 's office,
was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation.

She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.

"What I mean is, " explained the recorder,
"do you have a job or are you just a ....?"

"Of course I have a job," snapped the woman.

"I'm a Mom."

"We don't list 'Mom' as an occupation,
'housewife' covers it,"
Said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself
in the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall.
The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised,
efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like,
"Official Interrogator" or "Town Registrar."

"What is your occupation?" she probed.

What made me say it? I do not know.
The words simply popped out.
"I'm a Research Associate in the field of
Child Development and Human Relations."

The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and
looked up as though she had not heard right.

I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words.
Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written,
in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.

"Might I ask," said the clerk with new interest,
"just what you do in your field?"

Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice,
I heard myself reply,
"I have a continuing program of research,
(what mother doesn't)
In the laboratory and in the field,
(normally I would have said indoors and out).
I'm working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family)
and already have four credits (all daughters).
Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities,
(any mother care to disagree?)
and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it).
But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers
and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money."

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she
completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.

As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career,
I was greeted by my lab assistants -- ages 13, 7, and 3.
Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model,
(a 6 month old baby) in the child development program,
testing out a new vocal pattern.
I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy!
And I had gone on the official records as someone more
distinguished and indispensable to mankind than "just another Mom."
Motherhood!

What a glorious career!
Especially when there's a title on the door.

Friday, November 6, 2009

YouTube - Beyonce Sweet Dreams Live at MTV Europe Music Awards 2009 Berlin HQ

YouTube - Beyonce Sweet Dreams Live at MTV Europe Music Awards 2009 Berlin HQ

Fruit Of The Spirit

Which fruit do you have?? Read...



Fruit Of The Spirit

Posted using ShareThis

The little things are- Amazing


Real Quick before I do dinner;
Caden and I spent the day together today doing different things that he enjoyed. I learned a big thing about him today though. I learned something that he listens so deeply & I thought he wasnt and I am not even sure what he really knows in his mind after today. So I guess he is a exactly like Steven with information and knowledge. You would never know what was in his mind until he was ready or needed to share it. Its amazing to me what he has listen to from me. It makes me in pure excitement to know he really cares what I am saying and listening. It was sharing things with me today that I told him 6 months ago. I love Caden- now I know that he is always listening and its amazing what he stores in his mind.
It was such a nice today to spend it with Caden alone because it means so much to him to give him my time and full attention sometimes. I am very proud and thankful for him. He keeps me going in so many ways. He loves like no other. I have doubts about who cares and loves me I promise I will always know Caden does because that is 1 thing he is very open with is his love. WEll, I guess I learn a few new things today.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Caden figured out the WEBCAM today.. HUUULK!

Families Raising Christian Kids



Raising children to be faithful Christians is the parents' sole responsibility. The church is an instrument used to help you accomplish this very important task.

Ephesians 6:1-3 says, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." "Honor your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise— "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Wow! Does that speak volumes to you? It should. Paul is telling us that if children obey their parents, God will be pleased with them and they will enjoy a long life on earth. Of course, a child will not know this is a promise for them in the Bible, if no one ever tells them where to find it. The verses go on to say in Ephesians 6:4, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." This is telling earthly fathers not to irritate their children, not to cause them to become bitter and angry. But, instead they should train and instruct their children using the Bible as their manual. God has clearly given parents the responsibility to raise their children as faithful Christians.

What is happening in our society today that causes parents to lay the responsibility of teaching their children about Christ on the church they attend? Of course, the biggest issue is time constraints. Busy work schedules, homework, extracurricular activities, and social events are soaking up all of our time, leaving very little time to teach our kids about Christian values. Another issue is fear. Many parents long to be the ones teaching their children about Christian values, but they feel inadequate to do this. They feel like they do not know enough about the Bible to take on this responsibility. And, a third issue is just plain lack of responsibility. Parents may feel that as long as their children are going to Bible/Sunday School, they are doing their role in teaching their children Christian Values. This is a sad situation for the parent and child relationship.

Time Constraints. This situation is easy enough to resolve. If being your child's teacher about Christian values is a priority to you, here are some tips that may make it easier for you and your family to spend some quality Bible time together:

* Make reading and discussing the Bible a nighttime routine. Instead of reading storybooks at night, read the Bible for 15 minutes and discuss what you've read for 5 minutes.
* Have everyone in your household eat dinner together. A sit-down meal is a great place to do a Bible devotion and have a family discussion. The dinners do not have to be fancy, everyone just needs to be there together!
* Listen to Christian radio stations in the car. Use the lyrics of the songs to prompt discussion and what the words mean. Most Christian lyrics are heartfelt and have a real meaning to them.

Fear. In all honesty, not very many people know the Bible cover-to-cover and what God says for every situation. That is why the Bible is our blueprint or manual. It is meant to be with us always. We refer to it as needed for all of our needs. Tell your children that when they have a question to ask about anything, whether pertaining to Christianity or social situations, to let you know, and you will help them find out what God has to say about it in the Bible. Most Bibles have concordances that will let you know where you can find exact verses for many different situations. You can use the Internet, as well. Bible Gateway is an awesome resource for looking up the Bible online. Remember that God is with you and you are who He commands to teach your children. Your church will jump at the chance to aid you with resources, whereby you can handle the task of teaching your children and gain some wisdom yourself.

Lack of Responsibility. This can be a discomforting issue to bring up, but the truth be told, it is a serious misconception or miscommunication that the church is responsible for raising your children with Christian Values. This issue has different facets, the first being the belief that if you go to church every Sunday, you will get to heaven. The only way to heaven is through Jesus. Jesus himself says in John 14:6, "Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." You, nor your children, will see the Kingdom of Heaven without having acknowledged Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior. Just showing up to church every Sunday with your children is not completing the task at hand. Reading the Bible daily and having engaging discussions will show your children that Jesus is important to you, and, thus, should be important to them.
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Another reason parents lay the task of teaching their children Christian values is that teaching themselves is not a priority in their life, and just assume that someone else do it for them. The church is an instrument used to prepare us to tell others about Christianity. It equips us with the tools we need to carry out the Great Commission (Matthew 28:16-20). It is a wonderful thing when a church provides a Children's Ministry to teach kids about the Great Commission and the values that they should possess to be faithful Christians. Children may not know they are being groomed to spread the Good News otherwise. But, no where in the Bible does it say that the church is necessarily responsible for this teaching. On the other hand, it does clearly state that parents are responsible, as stated above (Ephesians 6:1-4).

Sending kids off to school everyday and having teachers in school may lull some parents in the comfort that they do not need to teach their kids about Christian values because they have "teachers" in Bible/Sunday School, as well. Kudos to Bible/Sunday School teachers, who are more than likely volunteers who have a serious commitment to telling children about how Jesus wants them to live. Just remember that nothing can replace the joy a child feels when their parents take time to tell them something as important as being a Christian. It brings families closer and warms God's heart to see this. Some churches do not have children programs or perhaps families only attend a mass or service and do not attend Bible/Sunday School. Who is responsible for teaching children at this point? Think on that. Will it be you?

Just for clarification reasons, the church is an important part of your child's and your Christian walk. Gathering with other Christians provides strength, wisdom, and teachings that we need in order to live a Christian life every day. It is just as important that you, as parents, are teaching your children about a Christian life every day, too.

Love Languages

What are the Five Love Languages?
Affirmation, gifts, acts of service, quality time and physical touch can enhance any relationship.


A discussion of Gary Chapman's The Five Love Languages for Singles.

What do you think your primary love language is? Supposedly we each have one distinctive one that we must receive in order to feel truly fulfilled in our relationships.

The first love language listed is words of affirmation. The language we hear, be it positive affirming words or negative language and feedback, drastically effects our developing personalities and therefore our behaviors.

The second love language listed is gifts: "A gift is a tangible object that says, 'I was thinking about you. I wanted you to have this. I love you.' . . . A gift by its very nature is not payment for services rendered. When a dating partner says, 'I will give you . . if you will . .' the partner is not offering a gift, nor is he expressing love. The person is simply striking a deal."

The third love language the book lists is acts of service. For instance, "I know he loves me because he always checks my car over before I leave on a business trip. He checks the oil, the tires, and makes sure I have windshield washer fluid, etc."

The next love language is quality time. This love language is about the experiences we share with our loved ones. How do you spend your time together? Quality time does not involve you in one room surfing the internet while he is in the other room watching ESPN!

Read more: http://dating.suite101.com/article.cfm/what_are_the_five_love_languages_#ixzz0W3kJDNOh